Be Yourself!

Sorry I haven't written in so long, guys! I've been SO busy! I had a chorus concert tonight, I'm currently planning for a band concert, my 1year anniversary is Thursday, I have ballet class, etc.

I just wanted to say, I'm proud of who I am, ok? I'm tired of people wanting me to live up to what THEY want me to be. Yesterday, my school held the "Million Words Party" at my school. I was invited since I read over 1.5 million words. Well, the party involved getting popcorn/sno-cones, and playing on the softball field outside. I brought a book, got the concessions, and sat against the wall in the shade. Immediately people started looking at me and saying I was weird and crazy for reading during a "Reading Party". I'm so shy, I simply mumbled, and kept reading.

My point is, don't call people names just because they aren't doing what you expect/want. I'm different, and I LOVE it. I don't want to be a cookie-cutter girl in a world of Sameness. (For you The Giver fans ;)) I am glad that I'm the way I am.

Sure, you're probably thinking that I'm overreacting, right? Well, I probably am. The thing is, I was bullied for nearly 2 years. It was so severe, that for a whole year, I stopped going to church, talking to ANYONE, and I only went out in public if I was forced. I basically became a hermit, hiding in my little shell. Before I was bullied, I was strong, brave, confident, and not at all shy. Now, I freak out at a simple look or comment, even if they aren't actually rude/mean. I take what people think very strongly, even if I don't like the person, because I'm afraid of not having friends and being hated. For those 1.5 years, my life was HELL. It ruined me, and the damage will NEVER go away. Along with the pain, there's also strength. I've grown stronger because of what I've gone through. Sure, I have my days when I feel like my heart is going to burst with fright, but I also have days when I feel like a Princess, and look like a Rockstar.

So, I'll say it again. I'm glad I went through what I did. It's made me who I am today, and I wouldn't want to change a thing. Because of my bullying, I can now help others who were/are hurt. I can show the world that even when life has become Hell, light always shines through the cracks. As the song says: If you're going through Hell, keep on going, don't slow down, if you're scared don't show it, you might get out, before the Devil even knows you're there.

On that note (literally), I bid you farewell, and goodnight.
Stay Beautiful,
Abbie <3